c8ptain:

my friends know how much i like hockey but they do not know HOW MUCHI LIKE HOCKEY

(via captaintazer)

theannieplanet:

so im babysitting this girl right now and we’re watching tv and the satellite sort of cut out cause it was raining really hard
so i just said “thunder god if you give back our satellite i’ll give you ice cream”
a second later the thunder clapped again and our tv came back
the girl is forcing me to hold up my end of the deal so guess who’s making ice cream for the thunder god

(via sleepfuls)

celeryandhummus:

our kids will probably attend a middle school dance where the theme is the 2010’s

they’ll wear leggings with ugg boots and twerk to “call me maybe”

(via sleepfuls)

dearloserchris:

teejaypinetree:

She wants the (ph)D

Not with that technique: no gloves, safety glasses, fume hood; the volume in the erlenmeyer flask is not suitable for what the flask allows; and the fumes from the left vessel are dangerously close to her nasal orifice. The only D she is asking for is Disaster.

(Source: teejaypineapple, via i-am-so--infinitesimal)